Day 3: Never Be Shaken
God doesn’t give us things we can’t handle, and today He reminded me of that.
Word of the day: Psalm 15— Never Be Shaken.
I know how to love babies and discipline toddlers with love and bring the joy of the Lord into a room filled with darkness. So today, God told me to not just go along and do/struggle to understand what other people do, but to just do me and that’s that.
Today I walked into that little shack and gave a billion “airplane” rides, made a 4 man bumpy rollercoaster ride with my legs, played “ride the bull” for a solid hour, disciplined the kids in nice and completely effective ways, sang songs, laughed, danced like a crazy lady and loved.
I was with Ashwin majority of the morning too. He’s officially my fave, along with trouble maker Shaegyn who is absolutely awesome. His diaper rash was the worst I’ve seen it and I’m making it a priority to get to the store/pharmacy tonight. The pain of holding his hands while he went through incredible pain still epically sucked, but he craved to be in my arms, it’s all he wanted all day long. He would just hold onto me and look into my eyes. It was clear he knew it was a safe haven. So in my arms he stayed, he slept on my chest, I cleaned our his ear goop, and held him as he cried. I also taught him how to click his tongue today, he caught on so fast (after lots of drooling attempts on my shoulder) and he almost giggled! I love that boy.
Through all of it, the woman who wrecked my heart yesterday came in again today. She tried to hold Amelia but Amelia wanted nothing to do with her so as Amelia pulled away the woman tried to trip her and hit her, but I looked at her and took her hand gently and said, “That’s not okay in this house.” She just looked at me stunned and then lightly smiled it off.
She sat there for a while and watched me play with the kids. Auntie also watched. When Ashwin started to cry, the woman (and auntie the first time she watched me care for him) was shocked that I didn’t yell at him to scare him into silence or hit him to tell him crying was “wrong”. But instead she watched as I rocked him and talked in my annoying little sweet baby loving voice telling him it was okay before I sang him “Jesus Loves Me” and kissed him on the forehead as he fell asleep in my arms.
She was shocked.
Right as this was going on, a few of the lil guys were causing minor trouble by standing on a bench looking out the window which they apparently aren’t supposed to do. My heart was so filled up when Auntie said their names, took them from the seat, set them down, and DIDN’T hit them or threaten them with her shoe, but instead explained what they did wrong and said they wouldn’t get to play with playdough if they did it again. Not one of them got back up on that stool, and if she would’ve hit them, I guarantee they would have when they got done crying. That’s when the woman decided to leave. She called Amelia over to her and KISSED HER ON THE FOREHEAD and walked out the door. Yep. That’s Jesus working for ya! SO good!!
The rest of my time in the crèche was spent holding Ashwin while I put the other 9 to bed. I never have time (aka hands) to open my bible when I’m there, so I always intercede for Abby and some people on the other half of the squad. Abby came and got me and I was in shock— our chaotic class walked back without ONE fight!!! (there’s an average of about 7 usually.) And the rest of the day was awesome. We were encouraging the kids a ton and they ate it up. They’d never received that before. Chocolate was our way of rewarding them, and they loved it.
God has taught me so much in the past 6 months about who I am in Him and different ways He’s equipped me. He’s given me these things so that I can use them, be an example, and pass them on to change atmospheres.
